I'm so porny right now

Is it a compliment to be told you look like a porn star?
A friend of a friend recently insisted that not only had I done porn but he had a copy of one of my videos.

I hope he's not confusing me with Ron Jeremy

New Hottness

I was introduced to this album by Joe this past weekend - and I have to say it's one of the most entertaining pop albums I've seen in a while.

It's a great mix of R&B, pop and dance music. I'm sure you've heard the lead single "Umbrella" about a thousand times.

How can you not love an album that has a song like"Breaking Dishes", a lyrical sample of which is below:


I'm still waiting, come through the door
I'm killing time, you know bleaching your clothes
I'm roasting marshmallows on the fire
And what I'm burning is your attire
I'm getting restless
I'm getting tested
I can't believe he is always out every night and never checks in
Is he cheating? Man I don't know
I'm looking 'round for something else to throw

I'm breaking dishes up in here
All Night (Uh-huh)
I ain't go stop until I see police lights

I live for this woman

Badge of Shame

reads: "You were @ Mr. Black last night" - ughh

why do these things never wash off?

Heading back to the US

So, I'm finally returning home from my brief stint in Europe. It's definitely been an interesting experience.

Don't get me wrong - I love to travel, and seeing Ireland (for the first time) and Moscow (for the second) has been a great experience but I'm ready to sleep in my own bed again.

I have to say, visiting Moscow in May is clearly much better then visiting in November/December. The last time I was here the sun came out from behind the clouds for literally 10 minutes in an over two week period --- and it was such an event that I took a picture to mark the occasion. During my most recent visit I don't think I saw a single cloud in the sky.

The most striking thing about Moscow for me is it's intense consumer culture- even more conspicuous then that of the New York! I don't think I've ever seen such a concentration of Louis Vuitton and Dolce & Gabbana in my life.

At any rate, I'm currently in the lounge at Международный Аэропорт Москва-Шереметьево (that's Sheremetyevo International Airport to non Russians) and I'm hoping this flight is a bit quieter then the one from London to Moscow. On my way in I was surrounded by a group of Russian students returning home (many clad in D&G, with the aforementioned LV bags - natch) who immediately broke out bottles of Moet the minute our plane hit the sky. The rest of the flight was like being at a bad karokie bar - the students were completely wasted and were singing bad pop music along to their iPods at the top of their lungs. We were treated to the worst of both Russian & English pop music - and to be honest I'm not sure I appreciated their rendition of "My Humps" at 3 in the morning.

Maybe I'm just getting (am?) old.

Lost in Translation

I've had several lost in translation moments today.

First, I was woken up by the sound of classical players. I open my door to find an entire string section playing various traditional Russian music. This was a bit unexpected.

I asked one of the English speaking staff what this was about and she explained they were the entertainment for the Sunday brunch at the hotel. Brunch sounded enticing so I went to check it out.

Upon arriving at the restaurant I was informed that as a hotel guest I would be given a special price for brunch - only 3,500 rubles - or about $140. Those better be some fan-fucking-tastic eggs.

My common sense told me that I'd probably be fired if I attempted to expense what was essentially a $140 omelet so I decided to walk over to the Aeroflot office to change my flight back to NY to an earlier day. Unfortunately, no one in the office spoke English. The helpful woman at the counter told me the only words she knew in English - "I love you". This was not so helpful given the current situation.

Using a series of pantomime, as well as some rapid fire pointing at a calendar I got the idea across, and in the end managed to change my flight.

I've also continued my streak of great timing - as I managed to catch the tail end of this. Very sad.

Party Fowl

So I've had the privlidge of spending the last few days at a 12th century Irish castle for a work function. They've transformed the castle into a five star hotel and resort which just about every important person seems to have stayed at (including our esteemed president).

Like most high end hotels this one has a high end restaurant.
I don't know why "high end" always means exotic meats - but over the span of two meals I was served ostrich and PIGEON FOIE GRAS. Yes, Pigeon filet plus what I think was a paste made out of pigeon liver.

Now, if you know anything about me you know that I am a bit picky as to what kind of meats (or even what cuts of meats) I eat. Needless to say I was not feeling the birds.

The ostrich was actually ok - if I hadn't known I would think I was eating beef. Pigeon on the other hand was this grey looking thing that was extremely tough and left a nasty aftertaste.

Oh well .. better luck in Moscow

And in a related story....

http://youtube.com/watch?v=EERdNnu9mic

reflections on Ireland

So I decided that since I'd be going to Ireland for a conference it would be a good idea to spend some extra time in Dublin - since I very rarely (ok, never) find myself in this country.

It's been an interesting experience so far.
It's very hard to find healthy food here (not surprising) or a full service gym (again, not surprising) and I have yet to see the rumored warmth of the Irish people (surprising).

What have I seen? Drunks. Lots of them. On the street, in the hotel, at 10pm, at 10am - in the park, on stilts, dressed as cows on the toilet (really!) -- basically everywhere.

pics to follow.